She was basically living in her own world where she turned a blind eye to anything outside of her happy bubble. He was gay, which his wife knew from the start, but he was deeply closeted for fear of losing his family. He had a daughter, the same age as Ben’s youngest. Kieran had a totally different situation. After his sister encouraged him to make friends, he did so with a fellow commuter who had intrigued him from the start – Kieran. The result of this, however, was that Ben was extremely lonely. She took every opportunity to throw Ben’s “knocking her up” in his face, and didn’t deserve, in my opinion, to have any say in their lives. She was extremely selfish, not putting Ben, let alone the kids, ahead of her own wants. This has left Ben at home to basically raise the kids himself.

Now, she is moving forward with those plans, but unfortunately, she is doing do halfway across the country where her parents live. He and his wife, Allison, had the kids early and somewhat by accident which put her college plans on hold. My heart broke for each of them more than once.īennett (Ben) is married with two boys.

Two men, two separate yet similar circumstances, brought together by chance with a friendship growing and turning into something so much deeper. What these guys go through felt so real and raw and so unbelievably easy to understand and believe what they were going through. If we could go back to when we met on the train…if we could erase the deceit, erase our first hello…would we?Īnother Cara Dee winner for me! This story really brings out the feels. Just not enough to stop, not enough to walk away, and I knew we constantly asked ourselves the same question because of it. Were we monsters or men? Were they one and the same? Did we give a flying f-hell. Not unless I was prepared to hurt everyone around me. I saw everything I wanted that I couldn’t have. I saw Kieran standing behind me, pressing a kiss to my shoulder while he undid my belt. My sister asked me if I could stand the sight my own reflection, if I’d caused enough damage yet, but I didn’t see myself when I looked into the mirror.

If We Could Go Back by Cara Dee